Category Archives: Nonsense

Poem 57 – “b’s and d’s” (Billy the Bee song)

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“b’s and d’s (Billy the Bee song)” by Jaymie Gerard

 

Billy the bee, buzzing by me

Bringing blueberry pie

Baked it for Bob (he’s a big bug)

And Betty the butterfly

 

Blueberry’s best, when put to the test

But blackberry’s close behind

Boiled and baked, in a pancake

How ‘bout them both combined?

 

B b b b b buh

B b b b beee

Circle’s on the right side

Line’s on the left, you see

 

Davie the dog, diggin’ by day

Droolin’ and diggin’ by night

Dug a big ditch, Daddy fell in

While dancing to Clementine

 

Ditches are dug, and in the backyard

Are daisies and dandy holes

So dance, Daddy, dance, but don’t take the chance

Of dancing with your eyes closed

 

D d d d d d d d

D d d d Deee

Circle’s on the left side

Line’s on the right, you see

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Poem 55 – Chickens and Cows

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“Chickens and Cows” by Jaymie Gerard

Why’s a chicken called a chicken

And a cow known as a cow?

I think I’d like to switch the two

Oh yes, and this is how –

 

From this day forth it’s going to be a chicken’s job to moo

Chewing on her cud will be her favorite thing to do

She’ll mosey to the parlor and give us chicken milk each morn’

And she’ll be grazing on the pasture from the day that chick is born

 

Now cows, of course, will be busy laying eggs for us to eat

They’ll cluck their days away and scratch the ground with their cow feet

They will live out in the cow coop, safe from foxes through the night

And the strongest males will say bull-a-doodle-doo before they fight

 

So what’s the difference, you may ask,

If the names are switched or not?

I guess there really isn’t one

But it was worth the thought!

Day 33 – “How Do Words Get Their Names?

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“How Do Words Get Their Names?” by Jaymie Gerard

 

How do words get their names?

Like cup and chair and slide

Did somebody just make them up?

Who gets to decide?

 

Are they voted on in Congress?

Are they picked out of a hat?

Is naming things somebody’s job?

I bet I could do that…

 

I’d start each morning with a sneep

And end it with a plip

But Saturdays I’d krin kran krun

And also fleegle fwip

 

I’d pass by neighbors on the streets

And say, “Good floffle, friend”

And when I pass them later on

I’d tell them, “Drik drak drend

 

If I was feeling hungry

A plate of schnicky would be nice

Of course, if I was thirsty

I’d get balla-goo, on ice

 

I’d always ask my wudclog

If I was thribblegob to play

And if she told me no

Then I’d be hob-bob for the day

 

When it’s my turn to take

My neepneep for his walk outside

I’d listen to him opp at other

Neepneeps that walk by…

 

You see, the words that I’d make up

Would have much better names

Plus, one thing you can count on is

They’d be more fun to say!

 

 

 

Day 17 – “Wiggle Waggles”

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“Wiggle-Waggles” by Jaymie Gerard

Inspired by Dr. Seuss

 

When wiggles seem to waggle

And waggles seem to wone

Then wimples start to whisper

In a wiggle-waggle tone

When wimples whisper woning-waggles

Hand them each a phone

Oh, but when they waggle wiggle-whispers

You best leave them alone